For the College-Bound Graduate

I continue to see facebook updates reading, "Last day of school!" and "finally graduating!" I can't help but think back to six years ago when I was in the same place in my life.

Graduation was such an exciting time. There really is no other experience in life quite like leaving behind your childish years and embarking on a new adventure- however dramatic that might sound.

When I had just graduated, I had the world before me. I was heading off to the University of Georgia, and my life was about to change. 100 percent. Of this I was slightly aware. . . although, I was much less prepared for my new life than I anticipated.

Let's take a look.

 

 

 

Here I am (on the right) excited high-school grad, ready for all the excitement ahead of me.

 

Now, if I could time-travel (I'm working on it) and head back into time, I would have quite a few words of advice for my 18 year old self. Here they are:

 

 

1. Enjoy your freshman year. Don't worry so much about school- go out and have fun, and maybe try a little harder not to be so shy. Oh- and most importantly, ATTEND ALL THOSE STUPID SORORITY MEETINGS so you can meet more people.
2. Or, better yet, skip the sorority. Get involved with something that MEANS something- Relay for Life, Etc.
3. Don't assume that you are invincible- just because you drank a few times with your friends does NOT make you prepared for the bar scene in Athens. Take it slow, and maybe consider skipping the shots.
4. Never carry cold pills in your purse.
5. BACK UP YOUR COMPUTER FILES
6. Always be yourself. So cheesy- but so important. Don't "tone yourself down" or try to be someone you aren't. This is crucial.
7. For God's sake, please don't walk home alone. At 3am. In the dark. Across North Campus. Phone calls do not protect you. Oh, and no matter how irritated you think you are, don't leave someone's house at 4am and wander to a gas station. Not a good plan.
8. If you meet someone named Reid, run, do not walk, but RUN in the other direction.
9. Never drink and drive. No matter how little you have had to drink.
10. Once you get that freshman year out of your system, focus on school. Decide on your future now so that I (future Lauren) don't have to make any of those tough decisions :)
11. Don't be broken hearted over every relationship that fails. The right one is just around the corner, and once you find it, you will wish you had enjoyed that time to be young and single! shhh!
12. You tried, bless your heart, but don't chase any boys who don't show interest in you. If they aren't beating down your door, let it go. move on. It's okay to not have a boyfriend. That doesn't make you weird.
    
    
    Well that's all I've got for now. But, really, there are no rules, and you've got to live it before you can learn it. Hindsight, baby! 

Birthday fun

Yesterday, we celebrated my sweet boyfriend's 24th birthday!

Tanner was brought up in a family that never really celebrated birthdays... or, maybe they did... maybe my family just takes it a little over the top...

Because let's face it... we know birthdays.

My parents have always been CRAZY about celebrating birthdays. Any excuse to give to others and they are on it. No birthday is off limits.. including boyfriends and girlfriends of their children. So, in true Sandbach style, we celebrated.

Here's a look at T's birthday this year!

 

 

 

First, we had Taco Soup - his favorite. Then we moved on to gifts. My parents got him an awesome grill for his new house. Then he opened a grill cover from Haley and Stephen. My grandmother got him a pack of m&m's. Then, he opened my gift. This year I got him a sound bar speaker for his new flat screen, a DVD he wanted, the soundtrack to his favorite movie, for love of the game, and grill accessories.

 

Then of course we had cake!!

 

A great way to celebrate the best man in my life! 

Franndz.

Friends..

That's really what I am thinking about today.

I have been through major changes in friendships since high school. I think a big part of that comes from living in Athens- four hours away- for five years.

First, there were Tricia and Holly. They were my very best friends in high school- the ones I really considered to be sisters. The funny thing is that we are all VERY different. But somehow we made it work. I was also close with Devin- we had our ins and outs.... That was a very challenging friendship. Somehow I remained friends with all three of these girls through college by maintaining distant contact.

Holly and I would go through periods where we were close, and times when we did not get along. I guess she would be more like a sister.

Then in college, I became extremely close with my roommate, Emily. We were roommates all 4 years. She was always really focused on school and grades, but we had some really good times. I also became extremely close with Danielle, another KD who I lived with. We spent almost every single day together. I think I was probably closer to Danielle than any of my other friends. That friendship eventually fell out towards the end of college. It wasn't a healthy relationship, and its termination was probably for the best. However, that still makes me sad.

Then, when I moved back home, most of my friendships fell of the board with college friends. I still talked to all of my friends every once in a while, but things definitely changed. As I began my relationship with Tanner, I really considered him my "best friend." Who else, besides God, can you count on ALL the time to be there for you? Well, even boyfriends fall short. I started to hang out with some of my old high school friends, like Ansley and Liz. Eventually, I even made up with my friend Bethany. Devin and I started being friends again for a while, but that relationship eventually faded as well..

The funny thing is, friendships are constantly changing. It's almost like they can't stay the same. I always thought that a true friend was someone that was always there for you--always keeps in touch, cares about you. But if that were true, I have no true friends. And I'm not a true friend.

With life the way it is, always changing and moving, friends moving away and getting new jobs, it's hard to maintain that consistency. It seems to me that friends serve a purpose for a time in your life. When that time changes, so do your friendships. The only thing you can really do is consider your friendships a priority. Even if you're busy with work, boyfriends, jobs, you still make time for your friends. For example, I work anywhere from 10-20 hours of over time every week, but I still make time for my friends once a week. You've just got to. It shows that you care.

So what happens when all of those friendships you put so much effort to just move away? I'm not sure, I guess you just keep in touch as best as you can- that's something I haven't figured out.

The one thing I do know- to true friends, friendships are not dispensable. They are not replaceable with just anyone.

Giving Thanks

It's that wonderful time of year again... my FAVORITE holiday: Thanksgiving!!

I have always loved Thanksgiving. I have to admit- that may be partly because it's in the same month as my birthday- and there is a LOT of food involved :)

But, I also love the idea of a holiday with no presents- just love and focusing on family and friends.

This year, my family has a heck of a lot to be thankful for. Let me explain.

A year ago in December, my brother's girlfriend, Haley Waites was rushed to the ER in a very frightening situation.

I remember a few days before, she had mentioned going to the Emergency Room for a bad headache. I remember thinking- that's strange to go to the ER for a headache.

Then a few days later, she was vomiting and had lost feeling in her left side of her body. Her mother thought she was "faking" to get out of going to school. Once they realized that she was really sick, they took her to the ER, and our world quickly began to unravel.

They diagnosed my brother's 17 year old girlfriend with a malignant brain tumor. Inoperable. Only a few months to live.

I remember my cousin calling me and telling me- I just found out from your parents that Haley has cancer. I thought it was a joke. A misunderstanding. Anything. But. Cancer.

If you've ever come close to losing a loved one through sickness, then you know how we felt when we found out that Haley had little hope to live more than a few months.

Paralyzed.

That's really the only word to describe it.

I have never felt anything like it in my entire life, and I swear I will never forget that state of paralysis. Turn on TV. See TV. Feel Nothing. Wonder when Nothing will feel like Something again.

Repeat.

I remember wondering if my life would ever feel normal again, if i would ever be able to just enjoy an evening with Tanner again. Or laugh again.

Needless to say, it was awful. With some miracle of God, we got her in to St. Jude's Children's Research Hospital. I can't even tell you what my brother was like during that time because I think I've blocked it out.

Within months, a miracle happened. They told us that they didn't think it was a high-grade glioma anymore. They reduced it to low grade and we began to hope. A few more years? Hey, I'll take it.

Then, even more good news. In May, they started to throw out terms like "vascular" and "benign." But, "We still can't be sure."

And finally, release. That's the only way to describe it. Like we had been clenching our teeth for 8 months.. exhale- as we had been holding our breath.

She was cured. "No idea how" and "it's the strangest thing" and "I saw those scans and I KNEW it was cancer" and yes, even the dreaded "it will come back."

But today, Haley lives cancer free. So that, my friends, is what I am thankful for this year. I'm thankful for Haley... and her miracle... I'm mostly thankful for the opportunity to live life wide awake.... to feel that something again.

Birthday Fun

Lately, I have had more than usual going on.

Work has been insane... we had four rape callouts in the last four weeks- and I advocated for three of them. In our business, that means a whole lot of over time. 

Sometimes, I do worry that my job is too much for me, especially at this age. I do internalize a lot of the emotional aspects of my job sometimes. I think that my family and friends don't realize what I see at my job. It's almost like I live a double life, and I switch between advocate and Lauren... it's really strange. 

BUT aside from all the work drama.. my birthday was a few days ago, and it was FABULOUS. Over the past few years, I've gone through a series of not-so-hot birthdays, so this was a refreshing change. My friends planned a surprise party for me, and it was so much fun!

 My friend Ansley came to pick me up for dinner, and when I got in the car, two of my friends popped up in the back seat! We all then went to eat at Red Lobster, and then we went back to Beth's house and we celebrated! Then we went to Lucky's, the new bar in Remerton. It was great- I rarely get time to let loose these days so I really enjoyed myself. It also was really nice that my friends did something like that for me. I really haven't ever had anyone do something like that for me before besides my parents so it was nice. 

My sweet boyfriend bought me a Keurig Vue- so that was very exciting for me! I'm a coffee addict- and the Vue makes latte's and sweet tea and hot chocolate and anything you can imagine! It was a sweet surprise!

My parents got me a Michael Kors gold purse... very excited about that! Also some Dior makeup and a few other things. They also got me a red velvet cake- my favorite!

All in all- a pretty wonderful birthday! I can't complain :)

Election 2k12

 I could go on and on about political issues, but I think this will suffice. Everyone bases their views on their own personal experience along with critical analysis of the issues, and that's what I have attempted to do this year. Either way, I can respect either opinion in the 2012 election, as long as it is an informed, educated opinion, and not just slander towards the other candidate.

Get out and vote today! Your opinion matters!

MONDAYS

A typical Monday.

Come in to work... tons of email and catch up to do. Barely ever a minute to myself these days. Sometimes I wonder if I'm headed in the right direction. I love my job, but I work a LOT of hours and sometimes I do wish I had more time to just be my self. Not girlfriend.. not daughter.. not advocate.. just Lauren. Yeah those days are definitely gone.

That sounds pretty dumb, but the older I get the more I seem to be taken over by all the different roles I have to fill in my life.

When you work for a non profit, you see all kinds of things. You see what every one else chooses not to see... what everyone else would prefer to keep out. When you work on the weekends,.. you soon find yourself in a situation where all you think about its your job. You don't have time anymore to think about your hopes and dreams and all of that fancy stuff.

I guess what keeps me going is the time I do get to spend with my friends and family. I have nothing planned for the first time in a while this weekend and I am very happy about that. Usually I find myself on Mondays feeling like my weekend was stolen from me. What happened to leaving school on friday and being done until Monday AM? Well I guess that disappeared just like childhood- gotta grow up!

I'll tell you one thing though.. It does NOT make me in a hurry to settle into a full blown career. I guess what I'm doing now could be called a career, but I know that I will eventually want to do more, to see more, to be more... to wake up in the morning thinking- YES I get to go do what I love. I hear stories about that sometimes.

But I came in today with a major headache and wishing that I could go back to bed.

I guess that's a typical Monday for ya.